It's a Tuba Thang, Shawty, and other Cinematic Adventures

*The tuba quote is from "Drumline." Another one: "I don't know what the beef is between you two is but you better grill it up and eat it."

Several blogs have done this and I always say to myself, "Self, you should post your favorite movie quotes on your own blog." But then the Self and I get very busy with things like dropping my sister off to college in D.C. and ending my internships and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and B. Scott and I forget. But. BUT! Today is the day. I have one day before going back to school, so in the meantime, while I sit on the couch like a bum in sweatpants, here are some fave movie quotes:

And I'm drawing a blank. Hold on, hold on, let me think...ah, ok!

Legally Blonde
-Take my lucky scrunchie. It helped me pass Spanish.
-You passed Spanish 'cause you gave Professor Montoya a lap-dance after finals.
-Yeah. Luckily.

-Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't shoot their husbands. They just don't.

Remember the Titans
-I'm not Martin Luther King, Jesus Christ, Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. I'm just a football coach.

-Gary, if you want to play on this football team, you answer me when I ask you who is your daddy? Who's your daddy, Gary? Who's your daddy?

-All right, now, I don't want them to gain another yard! You blitz... all... night! If they cross the line of scrimmage, I'm gonna take every last one of you out! You make sure they remember, forever, the night they played the Titans!

-Let me tell you somthing: you don't let anyone come between us. Nothing tears us apart. In Greek mythology, the Titans were greater even than the gods. They ruled their universe with absolute power. Well that football field out there, that's our universe. Let's rule it like titans.

-You're overcookin' my grits, Coach.

Clueless
I don't even know why I'm listening to you anyway. You're a virgin who can't drive.
--That was way harsh, Tai.

Would you look at that body language? Legs crossed towards each other. That is an unequivocal sex invite.

Need I remind you that it does not say RSVP on the Statue of Liberty?!

My man is satisfied, he's got no cause for complaint. But technically, I am a virgin. You know what I mean.

Note: Ok, sorry, went on a Clueless rampage for a second there. Will continue with other movies now.

Juno
-Bren! You's a dick!

-I'm already pregnant, what other shenanigans could I possibly get into?

-Anyway dude, I'm telling you I'm pregnant and you're acting shockingly cavalier.

-(on the phone) Wait, what? Sorry, I'm on my hamburger phone...

Two Can Play That Game
-Ok, every girl's got a little bit of ho in them. But Connie? She's a different kind of ho. She's a lay-on-her-back, do-whatever-it-takes-to-get-your-man, kinda ho. I don't know how she got that big executive job, but three months after she got hired, her boss got a divorce. You make the call.

-Show no signs of weakness. Men only understand strength.

-Men. Why do you let your girl come over and bust all your shit up? That don't make no sense. Fellas, when you're doing your dirt, go over her house. That way, when she gets mad, she can bust up all of her shit, and then you can go home.

Also, any quotes from Anchorman, Wedding Crashers, the Kings of Comedy, or Mean Girls will suffice. Ah, movies. Where knowledge and lifelong quotables happen.