Sunday, January 13, 2008

I've found my niche

at the risk of sounding maudlin, i think i've found my new(est) passion: philanthropy.

we volunteered at a soup kitchen this morning, and it was absolutely fantastic. if you don't leave there feeling inspired and smiley, you must have a rock for a heart, because serving soup to the homeless for three hours is one of the most humbling, gratifying, and all-around purifying experiences i have ever had.

later during the day, during casual dinner with the friends at Cali Girls' house, i realized that something needs to be done about the amount of shallow people in this world, and that thing just might be found in the basement of the Immaculate Conception church. i served some of the nicest people, some were more polite and gracious and friendly that people i know who get three square meals a day and then some, you know? working there taught me a lot about respect, humanity, and well, blessings. i literally could have stayed all day at that kitchen, despite the chaos and achy feet; whether we got community service or not. everyone left laughing and joking and chatting...altruism will do that to you. it's a high that not even a look from the cutest guy, best yoga class, or yummiest piece of food could rival. the lead man was so friendly, he just kept talking about how much he loved people and how we made a difference even if we only helped one person. which was impossible unless you were completely lazy...anyway i want to go back. i could talk/write about this all night, but i'll spare ya'll the confessions of my do-goodery brain :)

still been hanging out with the Runner. the last time i was there i pulled the ultimate coup de gras: i wore my troublemaking shirt. the black one that looks like lingerie (i know, right? i play for keeps). but it was cold so i had on like two outside layers over i slowly unwound my scarf and unbuttoned my sweater, i couldn't help feeling like a sexy eskimo or something..the Runner's eyes nearly popped out of his head, followed by much touchy-feely almost boyfriend-esque behavior..followed even more by cute text messages ("u waz lookin good in them jeans"). get this, Science Guy (who's also his roommate! honestly they should make my life into a sitcom) had the nerve to look, dare i say, jealous?! he sent me a text today, referring to me as "ur fine self." i had to laugh, i mean come on. i don't even know what i want at this point, or, suffice it to say, who i want. dear God, how do i get myself into these things? even through all of the flirting business, i still don't think the Runner and i would be a good couple outside of all would be like being in a relationship just to be in one. who knows, maybe i'm being an attention-whore and he doesn't even like me like that. he hasn't made any moves to talk about possibly being together, unless, again, i'm being completely dense in which case means i probably am not savvy enough to have a boyfriend anyway. it's kill or be killed out there, honestly.

have not been to the gym in a week. i think it's showing. i go home soon, hallelujah!

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